why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
