respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
he puts the penis in happiness.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
