I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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