you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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