No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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