forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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