I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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