By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
