They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
