I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
My breasts were aching with rage.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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