sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.