Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
