I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize