today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
