Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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