Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
me + whiskey = a bad person
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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