I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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