She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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