hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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