is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
