can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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