I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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