VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Fuck appropriateness.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
