2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
