Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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