Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
