she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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