BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Randomize
