i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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