Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize