We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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