Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
