O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm determined to sit on that face.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
