So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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