this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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