Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
As shirtless as possible
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Randomize
