Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
