I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
The air was thick with penises
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.