Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
