her vagine was all disorganized.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
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You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
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I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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