i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
