i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
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