overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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