Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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