Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she peed on how many people?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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