The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize