i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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