At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk