you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize