imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Randomize