how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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